It has been six years since I started on my spiritual journey.
Seven chakras, a different chakra each year, in order from root to crown. Mix in gobs of assorted occult apocrypha, a degree in Psychology, a dash of Taoist interest, and a buttercream thick facade of Buddhism.
The What of Kevin.
Some things metamorphed immeasurably. Some not a bit.
Is this better?
I don't honestly know.
My mala broke weeks ago. I have plans for Barkme to reconstruct it, plans that will be ceased indefinitely.
My altar is all packed away. I knew I was right to get a steamer trunk. A hackneyed writing studio sits in its place.
My walk has remained untouched half a month. And so it remains.
My history is steeped in solid Roman Catholicism melted down into a static agnostic murk. Toying with the thought of going back to Church one Sunday.
Poo-tee-weet.
4 comments:
One of the many things I walked away with from our long talk in the spring was a deep admiration for how grounded you were in your spiritual beliefs. I was envious of the assuredness with which you accepted your path when I've been searching well over a decade for mine. This may sound like a backhanded compliment, but it's nice to know that even the most spiritually secure in outward appearance still doubt and search.
Thank you for reminding me to figure out my spiritual path. I've just been keeping on keeping on and I'm exhausted, drained and frankly ready to throw in the towel.
Seriously.
Thanks, Kev.
It is time.
I just have to know if anything I've done in the past six years has meant anything.
Or was I better off clinging to tradition and inertia.
Had a weird event last night. Very overcome. A bad bad trip, like something dying inside or leaving the body. Really scary.
This is the last time in a long time I'll be able to chalk that up to more than just a coincidence.
I think the fact that you compared sticking with your Roman Catholic upbringing to "clinging to tradition and inertia" speaks volumes. And if you really want to know if anything you've done in the last six years has meant anything, ask anyone whose life you touched in that time.
What questions are you trying to answer and, more importantly, why do you think a spiritual upheaval and return to the religion of your childhood will provide those answers? I ask because my own, albeit temporary, return to Christianity followed a period of such turmoil that I took off running to the nearest emotional safe haven and familiarity I could find for comfort and meaning and that was the church. I didn't find what I was looking for and I obviously didn't stay but I'm glad I made the journey.
If you ever feel the need, I'm just a phone call away and available for deep philosophical discussion over any beverage of your choice. I'll even be generous and buy the first round.
Post a Comment