A Letter to Tchotchke

You'll probably never read this, but I hope one day you stumble onto it.


There are three things that I keep as my memory of you:

1. I like you. I never didn't. Your brash, loud-talking Peppermint Patty demeanor got me curious about you from the day I met you. And for as much as your brashness kept a lot of people at bay, it allowed me to see what happened when your defenses went away, when you became sweet and generous and completely the opposite. Even when we were at odds and spoke in tension or not at all, I still liked you. Even now.

2. You were good for me. You taught me how to argue, how to present my thoughts and motives patiently in an organized and effective manner. I had to bring my A-game every time because I knew you would. And you deeply cared about what I did, in my career and in my life. You were my loudest cheerleader and my fiercest critic. And I know I would be nowhere near as dedicated in following my heart and my dreams had I not met you.

3. At some moments, you were absolutely the most perfect person at the perfect place with perfect timing. To this day I recall our trip to Paris as the best vacation I ever had, solely because I had the most perfect tour guide ever. You threw my first and only surprise party and succeeded in delightfully shocking me speechless. You took a stronger personal interest in Deaf Culture than any girl I ever dated, and that meant the world to me. And how many girls would sit in their man's broken-down car fending off cabbies waiting for the tow truck to come? I felt like a complete loser and you defended my loser-ness.

If you think I haven't been hurt this past year, you're wrong. So many things happened where I wanted you to be the only one around me, and I know I missed out on a lot of big events in your life, events I wanted to share with you.

I know you're seeing What's-His-Face now, and I'm sure you're having a wonderful time with him. Even if you're not seeing What's-His-Face, it's easier and better for me to believe that you are.

A good friend is a rare commodity and a priceless treasure, and I lost one of the best the day we stopped talking to each other. I understand why it is this way, but nothing can stop me from having hope.

Miss you lots. Would love nothing more than to meet up with you some place and catch up with everything.